i've been eating a lot of carrots lately.  

like a handful and a half each day.  

i bring them to work with me and munch on them all day, which my coworkers tell me is quite irritating.  but what do i care? i don't have to spend eight hours a day with myself.

anyways, i hear that eating lots of carrots will turn you orange.

maybe then people might mistake my orange hue for a tan.  

and then i will be real hot.